Necrotongue

This film just wasn’t my kind of thing. It’s probably not the film’s fault, I just made the wrong choice. It was full of lengthy conversations about topics that I didn’t find interesting. Thirty minutes into the film, I realized that I didn't really care if the runaway was caught or if he escaped. I was just hoping for it to end soon.

The best series with a retro vibe that I've seen so far, although I do think that it may cause heart attacks among militant feminists and the anti-smoking and anti-drinking league. It's really interesting to see where some boundaries have shifted in fifty years. If I were an average American today, I'd probably need to see my therapist straight away. Being an average European, I enjoyed the series and had a great time.

What a blast. It made me laugh almost without stopping and made me remember when I used to watch the Muppet show on Polish TV. The award for Best Supporting Actor and Best Supporting Actress should go to Mr. Havelock and Miss Fanshaw.

The cast was decent, but the film turned out to be disappointing for me. I was just watching someone slowly die for an hour and a half without any interest in the story whatsoever.  Plus, those esoteric cultists were quite annoying, and the whole film kind of bummed me out. Eventually, it dawned on me that all I had to do to ‘enjoy’ a similar experience, was to turn off the DVD player and immerse myself in my own ‘afterlife’. The problem is that I want a film to make me forget that and not the other way around. I'm not a fan of French cinema, but Intouchables was on a whole other level.

I watched the movie for a while without laughing once, and just when I was about to start watching something else, Christina Applegate really got going and she kept me entertained till the end. All three stars go to Christina. If she hadn't given such a great performance, there wouldn’t be anything worth rating.

I really can’t stand musicals, but this obviously low-budget quirky series blew my mind. The writers poke fun at almost everything including themselves, which is exactly my kind of thing. Especially the "epic" battle in the second season with many references to Braveheart and Game of Thrones was excellent, as was any scene with the chef and the handmaiden (truly optimistic dialogue). Too bad the series got canceled, I would definitely watch another season.

The series rips off Pushing Daisies with slight modifications, but the quality is of a good standard. I started watching it to have fun and not to ponder deep existential questions. Surprisingly, it worked. I got a well-made show that made me laugh, so I'm almost completely satisfied. When I compare my expectations with what I got, I should give it five stars, but I'm taking one down for the unoriginal premise and for the character of Major Lilywhite, who gave me a slight nervous tic. The character I liked, on the other hand, was definitely Mr. Boss, he was perfect.

I gave the movie a rating of 4* not because it was somehow groundbreaking or amazing, but because it shows human stupidity in all its colossal glory. It is clear to all average intelligent people what quality they will get for the money at sales events, but some penny-pinchers let themselves be cheated three times just to drool eagerly at the designated gathering place and look forward to being robbed for the fourth time. We are quickly informed that these mostly retired unhappy individuals are not to blame because they cannot withstand the hardships of today's terrible times, but try to get ahead of such a defenseless person in line at the post office or at Kaufland, I guarantee you will be glad if you do not suffer any harm to your health...

I’m writing my review after having seen three seasons. The show is spectacular but lacks quality acting, writing, and direction. The whole thing strikes me as a failed improvisation, which is a shame because the original idea wasn't bad at all. It's just that the writer obviously stopped coming to work and then it all went downhill. I can’t say the actors didn’t make an effort. On the contrary, they tried so hard that they overdid it. There’s also too much of bathos, heroic poses, declarations, and speeches that make everyone stop even during the fiercest battle. On the other hand, there are things to be learned. For example, that it’s possible to build a hermetic room in 20 minutes in primitive conditions with basic tools using debris from a space station. Most cringeworthy character: Octavia. Most annoying character: the chancellor/prophet Jaha. Let me just add that I’m not an ardent critic of everything on the CW, I did enjoy iZombie.

Wow! I can’t wait for Season 4. In the third season, the writers have really outdone themselves and created a masterpiece that has the color, shape, size, and consistency of a standard product of one’s bowels. The boys and girls are chaotically running around the woods all the time, sometimes accompanied by a couple of adults to show that they are supervised, while everyone is constantly being divided into good and evil. Everything is so predictable it’s pathetic. Jaha the prophet and his virtual goddess just top it all off. Still, if I were a teenager, I'd probably enjoy it.