Koko perheen lemmikki

I'll never forget the day my father brought it home. I mean, I can understand mom's distaste for such a pet, however domesticated it was, but who could have ever suspected such unbound horror from this cute little animal?
Through its gaze my younger brother found the courage to declare his homosexuality to our family - whether he believed it to be true or not. At first this didn't seem to cause much concern, until my mother tried to "convert" him back by forcing her own sexual impulses on him. I, on the other hand, ended up a suicidal paraplegic dominatrix who tried to seduce my father before his twisted admiration for the rat changed him too, literally.
Watching it just sit in its cage, minding its own business, it was outlandish to suggest that this feeble little animal was the source behind the demise of my entire family, but it was. Unbeknownst to any of us, our new pet had powers beyond your wildest dreams. (jakelijan virallinen teksti)