Jungle Cruise

I don’t get it, really. I'm as big as The Rock (give or take 50cm), I'm as rich as The Rock (I regularly return returnable bottles), so why don't women want me? :o) ..... Probably because I don't play in similar interchangeable disposable mass produced movies. So, Disney Mouse, what's next? (12.08.2021)

Dwayne Johnson and Emily Blunt head into the Amazon jungle in search of a tree that can heal people. And most of the time they're running from something, whether it's Germans, animals or digital villains, and it's kind of fun. Jungle Cruise doesn't attempt any new things and relies on two charismatic stars, lots of visual effects, plenty of action and well-dosed humor. It doesn't excel at anything overall, but the result is a fine adventure film for the whole family. What Disney promised, it delivered. (29.07.2021)

It really wants to be The Mummy crossed with the first Pirates of the Caribbean. But it's a lot closer to The Mummy Returns and the fourth Pirates, episodes of their respective franchises that are so routinely unmemorable for any quality that I had to check if I'd actually seen them. The film is aimed at a slightly younger audience than one would expect for a family adventure film, which the filmmakers try to make up for with references to classics of the genre (from The African Queen to Jumanji to Indiana Jones). It’s a pity that most of them are forced. It's saved by the more than solid pacing, an excellent opening half hour that hints at a better film than what follows, and a cast that is visibly having a good time. My eight-year-old son was delighted, I was not charmed. In other words, your standard, routine Disney corporate CGI fest for the whole family. (30.07.2021)

Jaume Collet-Serra is a talented director, his first film Orphan is great and I liked his collaboration with Liam Neeson (that was back when Liam was still making fine films). Unfortunately, I didn't like this feel-good film. It takes something from Indiana Jones, Jumanji and Pirates of the Caribbean, but it can't come close to any of the them. It lacks its own edge, it lacks epicness or anything downright wow. I like The Rock a lot, but I wasn't entertained at all here; the humor went absolutely me, even Journey 2: The Mysterious Island was more interesting than this whole expedition. Emily Blunt is good, she's nice to look at, but I didn't trust the chemistry between the two protagonists. The jungle sets are quite nice, and even though it's too colourful and digital, the setting is probably the most interesting thing about the film. The villain here is not interesting at all good. The human one was chosen in a completely inappropriate and uninteresting way, and Edgar Ramirez as the "zombie" looked cool, but for my taste he had little room to do anything downright great. The action scenes didn't entertain me, nothing much explodes, there's a lack of physical action, it's more of a jungle chase with the occasional animal. Yes, the kids will be happy, but it's not enough for me and it's about half an hour longer than it should be. In the cinema I hoped it would be finally over and that's never a positive calling card. Two stars seems harsh as I'm obviously not the target audience, but for me it's the weakest cinema visit so far and a mild ordeal. Story 3/5, Action 3/5, Humour 2/5, Violence 0/5, Entertainment 3/5 Music 3/5, Visuals 4/5, Atmosphere 3/5, Suspense 2/5. 5/10. (30.07.2021)

A pretty well-made adventure movie, but the guys at Disney should have made some alterations to the screenplay which is pretty break-neck and because of that I can’t give it a fourth star. The Rock and Blunt have a big job in front of them to save this. Similarly to the Pirates of the Caribbean, this adaptation is a spectacular showcase of special effects generated mainly for profit = job well done. But instead of Verbinski, here Collet-Serra is at the helm, so here they make the killing more entertaining, but the voyage isn’t as smooth. But the twists worked with me and the Mayan city looked fantastic. (30.10.2021)

There probably has not been this much of a pleasant adventure since the third Pirates of the Caribbean. And it is with Pirates of the Caribbean that I think is the fairest to compare Jungle Cruise, because any other resemblance to The Mummy, Indiana Jones, The African Queen, etc., are more of a nod, while the Pirates of the Caribbean films are blood relatives. Those films also arose from an entertainment attraction, but unlike Jungle Cruise didn't resemble it that much, because this cruise is something else entirely. It is really mainly a fun ride on the river from one experience to another, during which there is something to watch and from which you do not expect any great drama. Dwayne Johnson pleased me by not putting much attention on himself, and he works well with Emily Blunt. I think everything is fine with the direction (Collet-Serra is no Verbinski, but no one is) and the script thinks of all age categories and tries not to beat the viewer over the head with jokes, action or surprises (for example, once, in the trailers artfully hidden sub-plot, which is, however, clearly taken from Pirates of the Caribbean). Everything is dosed nicely. James Newton Howard's great music deserves a separate sentence, which is really nice to listen to, and leaving the movie theatre again with a contagious melody playing in my head was a joy. (04.08.2021)

The film exudes the atmosphere and inspiration from Pirates of the Caribbean (the curse, the treasure, the locations) and The Mummy (the single-minded female scientist in the lead role), but that's not a bad thing, as Jungle Cruise takes the better aspects from its predecessors while not wanting to be just a copy, but trying to have some added value, albeit perhaps a minor one. The central duo Emily Blunt-Dwayne Johnson had a strange chemistry inherent in the opposites of frailty and exuberance. Jack Whitehall was a bit annoying at first but ultimately quite likeable, and Jesse Plemons handled the role of the Emperor's grandson brilliantly, with a subtly sociopathic calm. The trio of cursed conquerors was rather outnumbered and perhaps a little too artificial, but on the other hand I welcomed the character of Proxima. Even though you know how the whole thing will turn out, the writers prepared some decent twist and at the same time added more than one frankly funny scene or allusion to the script. A brisk, reasonably suspenseful and acceptably humorous adventure. PS: Plus point for the instrumental version of “Nothing Else Matters”! (31.07.2021)

Disney has produced another amazing adventure, and I couldn't keep track of how many different sources the filmmakers drew from (read: stole or ripped off). Those I noticed are The Mummy, Indiana Jones, Tomb Rider (the game), Pirates of the Caribbean, and All the Rivers Run:-) It was all incredibly "original", with an abundance of CGI (in terms of the amount, not quality), and it made the whole thing look like an adventure-fairy tale for the educationally challenged who like the jungle, rivers, boats, submarines, jaguars, musclemen, gays, heroic women, and dumbed-down scripts. I was partly just staring in disbelief, partly bored, and partly comforted by the presence of Emily Blunt. The youngest son of William II? Why? Do the Americans even know who William II was? (06.01.2022)